The Hunters

A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn’t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy’s voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“

Holmes and Dr. Watson

Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip.  After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”

“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.

“And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute.  “Well,

But what does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes is silent for a moment.

“Watson, you idiot!” he says.  “Someone has stolen our tent!”

Doctor, Doctor

This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What’s WRONG with me, Doctor!?”

The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you that there ain’t nothing wrong with your eyesight….”

Last Friday night as I was leaving work, I got a text message from my older sister asking if I wanted to make it a girl’s night out with my other two sisters.

I always have a great time with my sister’s ( I have 3 ) when I go out.  Problem is that hubby finishes work most Friday’s at 9:30 p.m.  All I was thinking was, “I don’t want to leave the house at 10 p.m and come home late”.

So I texted…

“Hubby doesn’t come home till 10:00 which is too late for me to got out after wards.  Friday nights are usually never good.  Have fun.”

So now, I’m officially labelled the boring sister.  However, I’m the only one that works on Saturday so I think I get a “boring pass”.

There was an orientation day at Jeffrey’s school to help introduce the school to parents and students.  The night before, Jeffrey was so excited about finally seeing the inside of a classroom.  This wore off during the morning when he refused to go to school.

Jeffrey:  I’m not going.

Me:  Why don’t you want to go to school?  You were so excited yesterday.

Jeffrey:  I’m nervous.

I then spent a few minutes explaining exactly what was going to happen.  That the teachers were going to take the students into the classroom while the parents have a meeting.  I reassured him that it wasn’t going to be for long but that he was going to get to color, listen to a story etc….

I also reassured him that it will be the first time for all the kids in the classroom also.  This made him feel better and he was ready to go.

Each kid got a colored insect/animal name tag as we entered the gymnasium.  Jeffrey had a purple butterfly.  The principal entered and did a brief introduction.

All is well…..

Then the teachers started grouping kids by name tag.

All is still well….

Teacher:  “Whoever has the purple butterfly, line up here”.

Jeffrey:  (Excited, yells out)  I DO!!

Then he runs off to stand in line.

All is not well.

Someone starts to get emotional.

Problem was, it was me.

I cannot believe how fast last week went.  When I checked my last post, I was surprised to see that it was over 5 days ago.  I think that it’s the longest I’ve gone without blogging.  I was missing the social connections.

The last week has been crazy.  Tyler got sick with a fever again and I spent a few days looking after him.  Between that and work, I didn’t even notice how fast the days were going.

Thank you to everyone who continued to visit throughout the week, I’ll be visiting you soon too.

Have you ever gone to a restaurant and noticed another customer’s food and it looked so much tastier than yours?  Well, Tyler has this syndrome.

He has now  developed a new habit.  He decided that he doesn’t want to eat anything from his plate, but grabs everything off of mine.  Jeffrey went through the same thing at his age too.  Both have something else in common too, they only go after my plate.

Daddy’s plate never looks as good as Mommy’s, although it’s the same food.

Tyler has this nasty habit of throwing ANYTHING he has in his hands in order to communicate his discontent.  His favorite is food, but he has no prejudice.

He throws food, toys, clothes, crayons, DVDs,…..anything.  He would even throw the DVD player, if it wasn’t connected with wires..  I’ve tried everything to make him stop but nothing seems to work.  Jeffrey never had this habit so I’m new to this experience.

Some of the things I’ve tried:

1.  Redirecting

2.  Verbal communication

3.  Removing the object or food

etc…

He doesn’t care.  He keeps doing it anyways.

This is not a pleasant phase.