Friday Frustration: Is Truth always the best solution?
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Welcome to Friday Frustrations, a weekly blog carnival dedicated to getting things off your chests whether big or small. If you would like to participate, grab the button and enter your Friday Frustrations link on Conversations with Moms Friday Frustrations Blog Hop.. You can write about several frustrations or just one. It’s up to you.
You don’t need to pick the same topic as I do.
Part of being a friend is being there for that person through their time of need. To be a shoulder to lean on and to listen during their “complaints”.
But what happens if that is all that this person is focusing on. I have a friend who is going through a tough time. I’m there to listen. The problem is that she has been finding herself in this similar situation ever since I’ve known her. She gets frustrated, angry, even a little depressed. She blames everyone else, but never asks herself why she is always in the same situation.
The frustrating part is that this is ALL she talks about. I find myself listening for hours about the same topic over and over…..and over. It’s the same complaints, it’s the same problems. When I politely ask why she doesn’t do something to get out of this situation, she doesn’t want to do anything about it.
I want to be there for her but it’s starting to become a little draining. Then I feel guilty for feeling this way, like I’m not a good friend. It just that it’s been going on for years now. The worst thing is that it’s a problem that can be solved. She just has to want it to change.
I don’t want to go into details out of respect for her, even though she doesn’t know my blog’s address. Which I’m grateful because I really needed to write about this.
I have tried to help give her some advice, but she just gets angry when I try to tell her what I think. Do I just continue to listen, without offering my opinion?
It’s frustrating because she’s a great person and all I really want for her is to be Happy.
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We have a friend who is like your friend, and I felt how you are feeling right now, you know what we did? We told her to do something about it because we were getting tired of hearing about her whining and complaining about her problems and she’s not even trying to do anything about it. It hurt her, but it was for the best… After that, she finally realized that she had to stop complaining and decided to do something about it.
Sometimes they just a need a little push to get them on their feet. I can tell you’re a great friend and I hope that your friend knows that, and give her a little push, maybe she just needs to hear from someone…
Hope your weekend goes well!
Ane´s last blog ..Friday Frustrations: Are you effin’ kidding me?*
here is mine! http://sugarfilledemotions.blogspot.com/2010/01/i-has-azmah.html
Melissa @ Sugar Filled Emotions´s last blog ..Checking Out Is Not Allowed
I have found myself on both sides of this issue so I try to keep this in mind when my friends need to share their complaints with me all though it can get quite old quick
angie´s last blog ..Friday Frustration
Hi.
I have included your URL into my EntreCard add on widget. It is actually an improved version of a droppers list.
To learn more about the program go to http://www.jr041283.com/2010/01/spread-love.html
I am hoping to hear from you soon. Happy blogging.
JR041283´s last blog ..Staten Island (2009)
I had a friend like that and after about 2 years, it just sucked the life out of me and I had to gradually pull away from the friendship. We haven’t talked in a few years now.
That kind of drama can suck the life out of you. I would step away to a more comfortable spot.
Harriet´s last blog ..Are you a Walmart Shopper? What kind?
It is hard when you try to help someone and you can see a better picture but they aren’t willing to do the work to try to fix things. I’m convinced some people subconsciously feel more comfortable with the drama. But it is frustrating for people who don’t like drama and instead have to hear about the same thing(s) year after year! I would just tolerate what you can stand and if it begins to affect your relationship negatively then be upfront about it with her or remove yourself from being around her/talking to her when she gets into it and she should get the message and find someone else who might complain as much as she does. . .misery loves company!
Andrea´s last blog ..If My Mom’d Had A Blog
I can relate to that situation too. I have a friend who has always have many problems and being a close friend to her, I became her confidante. I always become the shock absorber and it’s really draining. Some problems are not that “big” but her attitude in dealing with it is somewhat overkill. The worse thing is, ours is not a symbiotic relationship. She doesn’t even hear me out when I have problems that are really life-changing. It’s as if, she’s the only one who has problem in this world and it reached a point that I gave up our friendship. I just realized that ours was not a healthy friend relationship.
Sam´s last blog ..Our camera crushed!
i wouldn’t want to be drained of my energy by that kind of person. i’m definitely gradually putting a distance.
wendy´s last blog ..Day time and Night time Playmates
Hi,Maria! That’s not an easy situation you’re into but if I were her friend, I’d be straightforward with her even if that would mean enraging her.If she’s a good friend herself,she wouldn’t get mad if a friend would give her some smart pieces of advice, would she? You’re such a nice person and I know you’re a very busy woman,the last thing you need is somebody draining you like this.
Mom Says´s last blog ..My day at the SSS Office