There have been more and more stories with a common underlying motivation, “sense of entitlement”.  Stories such as athletes yelling at referees, Kanye West stealing Taylor Swift’s moment and corporate heads frauding the system to become rich are growing more and more.

According to Wikipedia, Entitlement is defined as

Entitlement is a guarantee of access to benefits because of rights, or by agreement through law. It can also refer, in a more casual sense to someone’s belief that he/she is deserving of some particular reward or benefit.[1] It is often used as a negative term in popular parlance (i.e. a ‘sense of entitlement’).

What does this have to do with Sunday Comics?

Well, I figured why not create some laughs out of this.  Here are jokes about the different types of people who have been on the news lately,  involving an act done because of a sense of entitlement.

CEOs

A CEO throwing a party takes his executives on a tour of his opulent mansion. In the back of the property, the CEO has the largest swimming pool any of them has ever seen. The huge pool, however, is filled with hungry alligators. The CEO says to his executives “I think an executive should be measured by courage. Courage is what made me CEO. So this is my challenge to each of you: if anyone has enough courage to dive into the pool, swim through those alligators, and make it to the other side, I will give that person anything they desire. My job, my money, my house, anything!”

Everyone laughs at the outrageous offer and proceeds to follow the CEO on the tour of the estate. Suddenly, they hear a loud splash. Everyone turns around and sees the CFO (Chief Financial Officer) in the pool, swimming for his life. He dodges the alligators left and right and makes it to the edge of the pool with seconds to spare. He pulls himself out just as a huge alligator snaps at his shoes.

The flabbergasted CEO approaches the CFO and says, “You are amazing. I’ve never seen anything like it in my life. You are brave beyond measure and anything I own is yours. Tell me what I can do for you.” The CFO, panting for breath, looks up and says, “You can tell me who the hell pushed me in the pool!!”

POLITITIANS

A little girl asked her father, ‘do all fairy tales begin with “Once upon a time”?
The father replied, ‘No, some begin with – If I am elected.’

ATHLETES

Two buddies Bob and Earl were two of the biggest baseball fans in America.

Their entire adult lives, Bob and Earl discussed baseball history in the winter, and they pored over every box score during the season. They went to 60 games a year. They even agreed that whoever died first would try to come back and tell the other if there was baseball in heaven.

One summer night, Bob passed away in his sleep after watching the Yankee victory earlier in the evening. He died happy. A few nights later, his buddy Earl awoke to the sound of Bob’s voice from beyond.

“Bob, Is that you?” Earl asked.

“Of course it me,” Bob replied.

“This is unbelievable!” Earl exclaimed. “So tell me, is there baseball in heaven?”

“Well, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which do you want to hear first?”

“Tell me the good news first.”

“Well, the good news is that yes there is baseball in heaven, Earl.”

“Oh, that is wonderful! So what could possibly be the bad news?”

“You’re pitching tomorrow night.”

CELEBRITIES

I would have posted a Kanye West joke but it’s been done so much in the last few days.

Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton were watching the 6 o’clock news. The news was about a man about ready to jump off a bridge. Lindsay turns to the Paris and says, ” I bet you $50 the man is going to jump.” Paris replies, “Okay you’re on.” Sure enough, the man jumps, and Paris Hilton gives the Lindsay Lohan $50. Lindsay says, “I can’t accept this money. I watched the 5 o’clock news and saw the man jump then.” “No, you have to take it,” says Paris. “I watched the 5 o’clock news too, but I didn’t think he would do it again.”

TEENAGERS

I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee. I asked the clerk to put some ice cubes into the cup so that I could drink the cool coffee quickly. At the window, there was a delay.

Finally, a teen-aged girl came to the window looking frustrated. “I’m having a problem,” she announced. “The ice keeps melting.”